Are They “The One”? Look For These Green Flags On A First Date

The green flags to look out for on your first date.

We’re constantly talking about red flags and what to avoid if you’re dating someone, but it’s about time we focus on the green flags instead. Green flags are the opposite to red flags, it’s a sign that someone could be the one and is giving you good vibes and you definitely want to stick around to find out more rather than running at the first chance.

While red flags are sometimes glaringly obvious, if we’ve had previous failed relationships we can be quick to be looking out for them, rather than looking for the green flags. So, if you’re headed out on a first date here are some of the green flags you should be looking for.

They pay attention to you

You’re on a first date so that means they should be paying attention to you and only you. Picking up your phone is often out of habit and while you might be getting group chat or TikTok notifications that seemingly can’t wait, it is quite rude to be on your phone throughout a date especially a first one. If their phone doesn’t even leave their pocket or the table then this is a good sign, they’re focused on you and not distracted by the outside world.

They ask questions (and listen)

A classic red flag in a date is someone who talks about themselves the entire time (without being asked!) and who doesn’t show an interest in you. If your date is asking your lots of questions and they actually seem interested in the responses, they’re clearly interested in getting to know you. Of course, these questions should go past your standard small talk, if they’re interested in your life, career, goals, ambitions and hobbies then this is all a good sign.

They treat others with respect

There’s nothing worse than being out and your date is being rude to your waiter or waitress, or the member of staff at wherever you are. Politeness and manners go a long way, and if your date isn’t treating others well it’s a warning sign of what could come further in the relationship. How they treat the other people you’re interacting with can either be a huge green or red flag, so pay attention to how they’re speaking to others.

They make you laugh

First dates can be awkward as you are essentially meeting up with either a complete stranger or someone you don’t know on a personal level very well. However, if they’re making you laugh that’s normally a good sign. If your date feels relaxed, you’re laughing and you feel comfortable around them then that’s a definite green flag.

They respect your boundaries

Everyone has different boundaries when it comes to dating. Let’s say you had a great first date and all of the above points were certified green flags. You’re leaving and your date asks if you’d like to go over to their house and you say no, or your date tries to kiss you but you’d rather not kiss on a first date. Even if the previous green flags were there, the way they react to your boundaries is probably the most important thing to look out for. If they’re respectful of your wishes and accept that you’d like to call it a night then that’s a definite green flag. If they’re trying to change your mind or their attitude starts to change and they get a bit pushy, red flag!

Someone not respecting your boundaries can really ruin an otherwise perfect first date, so make sure you’re clearly communicating what your boundaries are and watching out for how they respond. If you politely decline their invitation but suggest a second date and they’re up for it, then this is a great sign. But, if their whole personality shifts after a declined kiss or trip to their house they’re probably not the one for you and it’s best to get out of there as soon as you can.

Need more dating advice? Check out the best dating apps to help you land a date and how to navigate Valentine’s Day on a student budget.