16 great inventions too embarrassing to use

It turns out there's a solution for every one of life's problems. If only some of them weren't so embarrassing.

Tuesday 21 August 2012
posted by Ross Jones-Morris
Comments

This selection of inventions is going to ask you to answer this tough question: Would you rather have an easier more trouble free life or your self-respect?

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1. The Numbrella

The umbrella at it's best. But who wants to walk/cycle/exist whilst wearing that?

2. Anti-Theft Lunch Bags

Great for not getting your sandwiches nicked as it looks like they're covered in mould. On the downside, who wants to be the person who brings mouldy sandwiches to work?

3. The Rufus Roo

Who needs a huge baggage allowance when you can carry on all your luggage as hand luggage? Not the Rufus Roo user. It's a product that's as embarrassing as it's name and 100 times uglier. Yes, you'll cheat Ryan Air out of a few pounds but what they miss in revenue they'll get back in laughing at you.

4. The Can Handle

Are you getting coldy woldy hands holding you drinky drink? Aww. Then this can handle will come in useful.

5. Subs

It's a garter belt for guys who like wear their trousers round their ankles but not actually round their ankles. Acting like a pair of braces for your trousers, subs attach to the top of your underwear and keep them perfectly in place hovering somewhere on your thighs. Not cool.

6. Neck Air Cushion

A great solution for soothing neck and back pain, especially when sitting in the office. Just don't expect to get much work done with everyone constantly mocking you.

7. Hair-Cutting Umbrella

Look at his face. He's either very excited or very aware of how ridiculous he looks. We're guessing the latter.

8. Automatic Chopsticks

It feels like enough of a cultural insult when I go to a Chinese restaurant and fumble around with chopsticks at the best of times. Going in with these spring-loaded monstrosities would just be a rubbish effort all round really.

9. Clip-On LED Lights

Now you can read in the dark. Alas the tragedy is that once you've switched the lights on people will be able to see you wearing them.

10. Whatever This Is

It helps keep your long hair out of food. It looks stupid.

11. Sani-Fem Freshette Feminine Urinary Director

It's not as embarrassing as it could be since you'll be using it in private. Even so, please don't let anyone look in your bag.

12. Darkfin Webbed Swimming Gloves

When you go swimming you can now swim and look like an amphibian. But you'll also now look like an amphibian. Swings and roundabouts really...

13. Solar Face Shield

It provides full-face, 50+ UPF protection, as well as covering your entire face. It's a win win product.

14. Butter Stick Type

With all the gourmet factor of cheese from a tube it's the butter stick - type. Why type? Who knows. It's a useful idea, but let's face it, no one wants to use it. Not in public at least.

15. Trongs

Tri-tongs (or as they're better known - Trongs) are here to save your fingers from getting greasy when eating. Just make sure you've got self-esteem to spare before you use them.