10 signs you’ve been single too long
Maybe you should think about having a wash, leaving the house, and *actually* talking to people... you never know!
If some of these signs hit a little close to home, it may be time to re-evaluate your love life. Or lack of it.
Unless, of course, a future of endless nights in front of the TV where the only thing that keeps you warm is the sting of your tears as they flow down your lonely face sounds appealing...
1.) Average Joe just doesn’t cut it anymore
After years of obsessing over the likes of Ryan Reynolds, Blake Lively and other stunning celebs, real people just don’t seem to impress you anymore. Excessive pickiness could be where you’re going wrong, after all a wonky eye or a gold tooth is quirky, right?
2.) The whole world wants to set you up
After establishing for what seems the gazillionth time that you are, in fact, not gay, your family and friends are doing their utmost to find you a weird and wonderful potential partner. Yes, even your nan is lining up blind dates for you, as if a forced date is your only remaining chance of success.
3.) Third-wheeling is your favourite pastime
Whether out of pity or a feeling of duty, you’re constantly invited by loved up pals to gatecrash their romantic outings. As much as you enjoy the awkwardness of watching them canoodle while you sit around twiddling your thumbs, this just isn’t for you anymore.
4.) Please do away with PDA!
Have you become that tutting person in the street at the sight of any sort of romantic gesture people have dared to display in front of you? If so, it’s definitely time to quit being the green-eyed monster and find your own lover to cuddle up to on the escalator.
5. Emotionally attached to someone you’ve never met
So after an extreme facebook stalking session, you’re now deeply in love with your cousin’s best friend’s brother and don’t know what to do. Let me give you a hand: get a grip. Stop fantasising about what could be, get out, get drunk and try your luck with someone real!
6.) You have a warped version of flirting
So you hold a stare with a vaguely attractive specimen and think you’re sorted? Come on, time to get real. Either make the first move or forget any hope of a relationship because when it comes to romantic bravery, we’re all just as pathetic as each other these days.
7.) Your hobby is your husband
You’re devoting all your time and emotion to one activity which could be acting as a replacement for a real-life person. Realistically, Skyrim is not going to change your relationship status and the money could be better spent on taking someone out on a date, which is far from cheap!
8.) Let yourself go
So let’s face it, single life has gradually turned you into a yeti. Evolution seems to be reversing itself for you and mirrors are now avoided at all lengths. A slight revamp of your image, or just a shave perhaps, couldn’t do any harm getting you back on the dating scene.
9.) Slipping standards
Remember the days when you wouldn’t look twice at anything under a 6? Now you’re at the bar chatting up a 3 and there’s a big neon sign saying desperate hanging over you. Sliding standards are the ultimate sign single life has started to take its toll. We know this conflicts with the first point, but we've been single so long that we're starting to feel a little schizophrenic.
10.) Too much time with mum!
Cosy nights in at home watching Corrie becoming far too frequent? Spending a vast amount of time at home with the mother could be a sign that single life is getting a bit too lonely for you. Oh well, at least your mum will always think you’re special.
More student 101
Getting noticed online can seem like an almost impossible task - there's a lot of competition! We help you fig… read more