Not being on Facebook - sign of being a psychopath
Turns out that if someone doesn't have Facebook there's a higher chance they're a mass murdering serial killer. I knew it!
We all know the type. They walk amongst us going about their everyday lives. You never know who they are or why they are doing what they are doing but you know they're there. They are mavericks, social outcasts through choice and usually very proud of that fact. They are of that rare breed; people who don't use Facebook. And they're slowly becoming extinct.
This may sound a bit dramatic but The Daily Mail has today informed us that a lot of employers and psychologists believe that people who aren't on social networking sites are 'suspicious'.
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More than that, German magazine Der Taggspiegel has pointed out that along with morals and whole lot of sense, quite a few mass murderers don't have Facebook either (mentioning James Holmes and Anders Breivik). Essentially - if someone doesn't have Facebook they are probably a psychopath.
Even if the non-Facebook user doesn't decide to go on a killing spree, not having an account can still hurt their chances of employability. Human resources departments are apparently becoming wary of applicants without an online profile as it is now viewed by many as 'abnormal' and dysfunctional' not to have one.
With all this in mind, we've identified certain symptoms to look out for when trying to judge if someone doesn't have Facebook:
- Unusually high grades due to a lack of procrastination.
- A blissful unawareness of what's going on on TOWIE this week.
- An "I'm too cool and alternative for this" attitude.
- Their hands slowly clasping around your neck.
It is quickly becoming obvious that not signing up to Facebook will not be tolerated by society. If you know anyone ignoring Big Face Brother then please tell them to step into line, lest they end up in prison (or worse, MySpace).
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